Breathing

Connect my spirit and body. Breath.

Trying to ignore what is happening out there. Trying to ignore the response of people to the events. Trying to ignore evil. Trying to ignore hypocrisy. Trying to ignore the shouting and yelling.

Breathing in. I'm closing my eyes. Breathing out. I'm in peace with my self.
Breathing in. I'm opening my eyes. Breathing out. I'm in peace with my surrounding.

The last few weeks have been hard on my body. My lower back started acting up again and joined forces with my shoulder pain and my hips. It is very limiting and painful. I'm trying different ways to resolve it but nothing yet, I'm going to try a new chiro who I hope will be able to remedy my aching body.

Last Friday, I was in the Dragon head for the first time in a while. While I'm sure there are many things to fix and get better at, I think it was not bad going thru the dance for the first time. I will have to get my body in better shape, especially my shoulder, if I want to pull it off.

A Proud Parent

When I started training, it was because of few reasons that did not change much along the years. However there is one reason why I keep training that I never thought would be. I never thought that I would be able to stand in front of students and lead a class (especially kids). I never thought that I will enjoy it and that it will be an important reason for me continuing with Kung Fu.

When I teach the kids classes I feel a great responsibility to help the kids reach their potential, to make them better people, to empower them to do better.

At the end of the kids grading this past weekend I was looking at the parents as their kids were called to receive their new belt. Their was one specific moment that caught my eye. When Mr. Wilson stepped forward I was looking at his mom and her facial reaction showed how proud she was and that made me feel so good. It was a priceless moment for me. This is why I love (teaching) Kung Fu.

"I wanna be somebody else"

"...Doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe me somethin
A day in the life of someone else?
Cuz I'm a hazard to myself

Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else"
...Pink

I was doing some thinking lately and I believe I was trying to be someone else... I am trying to look at other successful people and hoping that I can do what they do. Well, it doesn't work. It leads to frustration and anger. Anger that I can't do what these other people are doing. That I can't do it as good as they are.

It is not going to happen. I can't just be somebody else. I'm going to evaluate where I want to be and what I want to achieve. Reviewing MY goals from the begining of the year and figuring our what I do next.

It is going to take few days/weeks of adjustments and then I hope I will be back on track.

Win or Lose

I don't like loosing. I wasn't planning to compete in the sparring events but I was not going to let sifu Regier get the gold without a fight... Both matches I started good and then I lost my energy. I get tired too fast and this is something I need to work on. I lost the match but I gained so much. So I actually won?

This year my son Kobe was in the opening Lion Dance. I felt so proud. All my kids participated and while some did better than others in terms of medals, they've all did great and conquered their fears or obtained their goals.

Now that my kids are older I would like to judge in one of the little kids events. I've never done it and I will have to make sure there is another person that can work with me on organizing the event (anyone?).

I feel it was another successful day and I enjoyed being around a group of people who want to better themselves and others. I think this one was a knockout - definitely a WIN for me.

Dragon

Dragon practice last Friday and Saturday was fun. I think we are gaining momentum and we are able to repeat the sequence with different subs. Sifu Lagner is doing fabulous job arranging this and teaching new tricks. 

Past paths

I've talked about trying to choose the right path in the last few months. Looking at the past there are always questions that surface about what if. 

Many decisions in our life are changing the direction we are going. By choosing one path we open possibilities and also close some. Choosing to move to Canada is one of the bigger decisions I had to make. It was not an easy decision and it is not easy now. Not being close to family. Not being able to help my parents. Not letting my kids the interaction with their cousins that they would had if we stayed. 

Now visit my sister and seeing how my kids play and enjoy being with her kids makes all these emotions and doubts come up again. It is not easy but I realize that we can't do everything be everywhere. 

I'm looking around me and I know I need to be happy. I have a great family. I have a home and the means to live well. I'm healthy (mostly...). I know that this is what I need to preserve no matter what path I choose. 

I ran 6 km (3 times in a row)

This run was not an easy run. I wasn't practicing as I should have (the most I ran this summer prior to this race was 6km), it was very cold this weekend, I didn't sleep that great the night before, there were lots of hills in the beginning (the view with the yellow colors was amazing), I was chased by a herd of cows and one bull, my running app was not working so I couldn't know how far I ran, and for the last 8 kilometers I was running in a small elevation gain (very painful).

But I finished 18 kilometers of trail running!!!

What kept me going when my muscles were aching? The mental game was in play. There was no way I would stop. I would have crossed that finish line crawling if I had to. Putting one leg in front of the other. One step at a time. Sometime fast and sometimes slow, but consistently going forward (except for few steps back when the bull started running...). I had to finish the race to prove to myself that I can do it but also (and probably more importantly) to allow the next person in the team to start their leg. Not letting the team down.

(You can clearly see the bull in the photo and I'm the runner on the left...)